Heroes star Ali Larter is not having a “heroic” look right now.
Avril Lavigne should use some of the cha-ching her rocker fiancé, Chad Kroeger, spent on her engagement ring and buy herself some fashion sense.
Whitney Port just hurts me so bad.
Words….fail me. (Keith Lemon)
I wonder how many butterflies were sacrificed in making that shirt.
Paris Hilton’s consistent. I’ll give her that.
Last month I was interviewed by the Wall Street Journal. Some liberties were taken with what I said but that’s to be expected. The article was also picked up by Jezebel and again, I was made to sound slightly stupid. *sigh* So I would like to take this opportunity to clear up a few key points.
One. Yes, I read erotic books. Do I read ONLY erotics? No. I read a wide variety of genres. And yes, I own 2 kindles. One is used for review books and one is for personal books. Do I keep erotica on my kindle? Yes. Do I read more erotica because of the kindle? Yes. Is it because I don’t want people to know what I’m reading? No. I could honestly care less what anyone thinks of my reading preferences. I’m not waving it around but I’m not hiding it either. The reason I read more erotica on my kindle is because erotica is predominantly published in digital form. Go to Barnes and Noble and try to find an erotic romance. You will, but they are few and far between. There is a much wider base to be found online. It’s cheaper for authors to pub that way and gets out quicker to the buyers.
Two. Mommy’s Naughty Reader. LMAO Do I call one of my kindles that? Yes. Does my daughter call it that? No. It was a joke started by my husband when he was trying to explain to my kid why she needed to leave my kindle alone. The kid has an ipad 2…she has no reason to read on my kindles but she is stubborn-like her dad-so he got tired of explaining it over and over and just told her I had inappropriate books on there. It morphed down to “Mommy's Naughty Reader”. Personally, I tried for Tori’s Tool Of Satan but no one would call it that. Boo.
Three. Do I read 10-15 books a week? Yes. Do I have a life? Yes. A very full one. While the articles presume that I am only a stay at home mom, it fails to say that I own my own business and work from home. I am also a free lance writer and make money reading these books. I found the comments that people had after viewing this tidbit to be curious. It was all negative. Like reading is bad or something. I am not a tv watcher-maybe 2 hrs a week at most. The average person watchers 6 hrs a day. My advice-YOU need to pick up a book and turn that tv off. Also, all those who poo pooed my reading. How many hrs do you spend online doing nothing but surfing? I’m willing to bet it’s more then I spend reading. I read over 650 words a minute. The average 300 page book takes me 2 hrs to read. So if I read 2 a day-I’m reading 4 hrs out my life a day. Now, the average erotic is maybe 100 pages that I can rip off 4 of those or more a day. Do I do this everyday? No, it’s an average. Some weeks it’s more, some weeks it’s less. But again, it’s part of my income. How much money do YOU make watching tv or surfing the web? Not a lot I’ll bet.
So while your sitting in your chair, reading these two articles and congratulating yourself that YOUR a better person because you have a REAL life-take a step back and realize where your reading this article. Online, probably in a little stuffy cubicle, while I am outside, in the pool, reading and enjoying the sunshine. And making money while I do it.
The April issue of Vogue is already sparking controversy and it hasn’t even released yet. In here you will find an interesting article on a weigh loss journey by socialite Dara-Lyn Weiss. I know what your thinking…“Who gives a rat’s arse, Tori.” Personally, I thought the same thing. Until I realized the weight loss journey was not of Ms. Weiss, but of her 7 year old daughter, Bea. Now, in Ms. Weiss’s defense, and trust me, after you read the whole article, you’ll realize this is her only defense, Bea’s pediatrician told her that her daughter was clinically obese. So after that and a school teasing episode, Ms. Weiss decided to put her child on a Weight Watchers diet program.
I took a particular interest in this article because my pre teen daughter also has a weight problem and was diagnosed as pre diabetic. Her Dr. (a metabolism and juvenile diabetic specialist) told me that she had to lose weight and get her sugar levels down before medication became a necessity instead of an option. He advised me to lose the fried foods, lose the sugar, and exercise more.
Some problems I had with Ms. Weiss is she used her daughter’s weight and the word “diet and obesity” as a way to shame her into losing weight. I found her methods cruel, vanity based, and emotionally abusive. In one excerpt Ms. Weiss admits to …
”I once reproachfully deprived Bea of her dinner after learning that her observation of French Heritage Day at school involved nearly 800 calories of Brie, filet mignon, baguette, and chocolate. I stopped letting her enjoy Pizza Fridays when she admitted to adding a corn salad as a side dish one week.”
Seriously? But wait, there’s more.
“I dressed down a Starbucks barista when he professed ignorance of the nutrition content of the kids' hot chocolate whose calories are listed as "120-210" on the menu board: Well, which is it? When he couldn't provide an answer, I dramatically grabbed the drink out of my daughter's hands, poured it into the garbage, and stormed out.”
The one thing I have never done is call it a diet in my house. I just call it eating better and made my entire family join. No one in the house gets to eat anything that we all can’t eat. I never once berated her in public for her food choices. I never dramatically flung food around in grand gestures to imprint on my child how important this all was. I admit we argued in the beginning as I was trying to explain to her the better choices we had to make and why. But I never let her feel like she was a bad person for the way she looked. I taught her how to make the better choices for herself. I also maintained an open line to the Dr to make sure everything I was doing was correct. The last thing I would ever want to do is cause my child to develop issues that will effect her negatively in the future.
What really jumped out at me is that nowhere in this article does Ms. Weiss place any real empathize on exercise or teaching Bea to make better choices in a non confrontational setting. Instead she claims that the key to slimming down is by making the child eat less and then bitches about how annoying it was to listen to a child constantly whine about being hungry. All the while snacking on the very foods she verbally bashed her child for wanting.
She goes on to talk about her own personal struggles concerning her body image and her weight as a child and teenager.
“Who was I to teach a little girl how to maintain a healthy weight and body image?" she asks, given that she's spent the past three decades "[hating] how my body looked and [devoting] an inordinate amount of time trying to change it." Among other destructive habits, Weiss took laxatives as a teen and "begged" a doctor friend to score her appetite suppressants that had been proven to cause heart-valve defects. "I have not ingested any food, looked at a restaurant menu, or been sick to the point of vomiting without silently launching a complicated mental algorithm about how it will affect my weight."
We do learn that Bea hit her “target” weight, (16 lbs lighter), after a year and is now the proud owner of a whole closet of cute little dresses and mini skirts. And best of all? She has all of mommy’s love. *insert sarcasm* Do I think Ms. Weiss loves her daughter? Yes I do. But being a parent doesn’t automatically prevent you from making bad decisions and choices concerning your child. Ms. Weiss does add that, “Only time will tell whether my early intervention saved her from a life of preoccupation with her weight, or drove her to it," but I have to disagree. Bea gives the answer loud and clear at the end, and all but assures us that she will indeed have problems concerning her weight and self image when she gets older.
"That's still me," she says of her former self. "I'm not a different person just because I lost sixteen pounds." A tear rolls down her cheek. "Just because it's in the past," she says, "doesn't mean it didn't happen."
Nice going mom.
On a high note *insert sarcasm again*, Ms. Weiss got a slamming book deal out of Random House Ballantine Imprint for shaming her daughter into losing weight. YEA Random House!!!! So not only did she embarrass and humiliate her daughter for a whole year, she is also going to continue to do so AND make money off of it.
Go mom.
I think Ms. Weiss should bank that advance for her daughter’s future therapy sessions.
Why is Emma Roberts dressing like a 40+ matron?
January Jones just looks weird in this dress.
Lucy Liu does the dominatrix/Borg look well but those nude pumps just kill the whole look.
"Top Chef" host Padma Lakshmi is a beautiful woman but that dress is straight 80s Vegas.
Rhianna is rich and beautiful….so why does she persist in dressing like an unemployed skateboader?
Shailene Woodley (Hunger Games) looks like an escapee from a Miami retirement village. Girlfriend, muu muus are NOT your friend.
Tyra Banks is a beautiful woman but no one looks good with Farah Fawcett hair…except Farah Fawcett.
Cake Wrecks is one of my all time favorite blogs. A tribute to all the sad, silly, horrible, and truly craptaculor professional cakes to ever grace a display case.
Here are some of my favorites that always put a smile on my face.
When a memo or meeting just won’t do…
Because childbirth doesn’t scare you enough…
Poor Brian…
I have spent hours thinking up random scenarios about the who, what, and why of this cake. HOURS I tell you!
HAHAHAHA The hose kills me. If you go to here you can get the back story which just makes it all even funnier.
Remember these? My grandma had them all over her house. I spent many hours playing those things.
Now I have seen numerous cakes make to look like these,
but I have never seen one like this.
Apparently, “even boys just gotta have fun”
We all do honey.
And the piece de resistance…
LOLOL Hope you enjoy as much as I do!
**thank you cake wreaks for the pictures and the laughs!*
Better late then never.
Somewhere in the black hole I call gmail is a memo declaring 2012 to be the year of the vavajay. It is not only to be used for entertaining purposes anymore. It has become an official fashion accessory.
The “Pocahontas gone wild” vavajay
The “please don’t notice my boobs have run away” vavajay
The “now you see it, now you don’t” vavajay
The “I stole my grandma’s curtains” vavajay
The “I’m not sure where my vavajay is” vavajay
The “LOOK AT MY VAVAJAY” vavajay
The “I’m to sexy for my…” vavajay"
Dear Susan G. Komen Foundation,
Today it came to my attention that you have halted all grants to Planned Parenthood, effectively stopping thousands of mammograms and related services to low income women. Why? These programs save hundreds of lives each year. I have been one of your staunchest supports since age 16 when my mother was first diagnosed with cancer. I have run and walked hundreds of races in your name. I have bugged, bullied, and yes, even cried, to co worker and strangers to get them to donate money to your foundation. I have worn the pink ribbon with pride; happy and proud to be associated with a group that promotes the well being of all woman regardless of race, age, political ties, and economical status. But today you broke my heart. Today you took all my hard work and tossed it to the ground because you choose to placate the right wing rather then stand up for the mission your company proclaims it’s built upon. You remember that mission statement don’t you?
I know you say it’s because Planned Parenthood is under a congressional investigation and you have rules that say they cannot associate with any company under a state or federal investigation. But I can’t help but wonder at the timing of it all. I’m sure it has nothing to do with any pressure from right wing pro life groups and their Republican allies who have announced repeatedly that they will target Planned Parenthood. Of course, it couldn't possibly have anything to do with the fact your new Senior Vice President for Public Policy, Karen Handel is pro life? And that she promised during her failed 2010 gubernatorial bid to end grants for Planned Parenthood to provide breast and cervical cancer screenings.
Because that would be wrong. Right?
Wrong or not, this is exactly what it looks like. Planned Parenthood provides lifesaving services to low income women. LOW INCOME WOMEN. Women who without this service would be virtually left swinging in the wind with no access to life saving health care. I find it ironic that your willing to let hundreds of woman suffer and possibly die to support a pro life cause. Planned Parenthood isn’t all about abortions. It has been proven time and time again that only 3% of it’s services are geared towards abortions. The rest is about providing all women with the help and information they need to make uniformed decisions regarding their health. THEIR health. Not yours. Not Karen Handel’s. Not the Republican legistrator who himself was bullied into launching this witch hunt. All your doing is hurting thousands of women, causing unintended pregnancies and delaying needed preventive care.
I am disheartened that your choose to protect your political assets then the lives of the woman who count on you. So for that, I will take my money and skills and give them to Planned Parenthood, where they will be used in the spirit they are given. To promote the welfare of woman rather then pander to your employees political agendas.
Sincerely,
Tori Benson
Ex-Susan G. Kormen Foundation member
If you would like to donate to Planned Parenthood, please click HERE.
Why is it that people think you go through life oblivious to things until they point them out to you? Things that are glaringly apparent to you and the rest of the free world with mere look in the mirror.
Recently I took the kid to the Dr for a check up. Her primary Dr has taken on some new partners and we saw one of them instead. I’m going to be perfectly honest here and say my child is a little overweight. She exercises, eats good, and we have found no inherent problems so we aren’t sure why this is, but it is what it is, though we are still examining causes. On a side note, I believe her being a preemie and some of the steroids they gave her as a child contributed to it.
Anyway-I KNOW she overweight. She KNOWS she is overweight. We are vigilant and working on it. Yet for some reason this new Dr felt the need to point it out, in front of the kid, in a condescending manner that suggested this was a big secret she had to impart to us.
To say I was a little defensive is putting it mildly. First off, I truly despise that false sounding voice that is suppose to inspire comradely but really just sets your teeth on edge. It’s a voice that translates to, “I think your an idiot, so I’m going to use little words and a warm tone so you don’t realize I think your an idiot.”
News flash-I know you think I’m an idiot and guess what? I think your one too. Then, for her to look at me and say, “I’m sure you’ve realized she is overweight and something needs to be done,” made me want to punch her in the throat.
Seriously?
Did you think I didn’t know that? This is my child. I’ve lived with her for 10 years. I know EVERYTHING about her. Sometimes, she tells me more then I want to know. :) If you had bothered to look at her chart you’d know we had been coming here for 6 years and have had multiple tests done, weigh ins, consultations, ect… Your not imparting surprising news to me. The fact she did that in front of my child had me rearing my head back to strike her down in a move worthy of Sodom and Gomorrah.
Sometimes I wonder if some people just weren’t meant to be working with the public. They reek of insecurity and fear, exhibiting a stiffness that just screams, “Kill me!!!! Kill me now because I am so freaking uncomfortable I will socially cut myself off at the knees every time I open my damn mouth.” Now I understand why the doctors are concerned, but to completely ignore the kid’s files before speaking to me shows a lack of communication and caring. Plus, it hurt her feelings.
I proud to say I didn’t not use my powers for evil and fry her arse on the spot, but I did have a talk with her while the kid was occupied and let her know that her bedside manner needed some work. I also let her know that what’s obvious to her is probably obvious to everyone and I didn’t need to know the problem (I get it-trust me) I need solutions.
So in retrospect, if you feel a “Captain Obvious” moment coming on and your need to speak is beginning to over ride your brain screaming for you to STFU, remember what’s obvious to you is also probably obvious to whom you are speaking to.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like an awkward family photo.
Notice dad put his foot down when it came to his outfit.
Santa looks scared.
Apparently the holidays are mysterious and confusing for some families.
When crazy seeps into the holidays.
Santa excites me too.
Oops, looks like Santa’s been a little naughty himself.
Somethings are better left unsaid. Or in this case, un shown.
Johnny decided that this photo op only needed one star-him.
